How To Breathe Through Plastic Bags
by transcontinental
Summary: This is how Derek Venturi slowly comes to the realization that things are more important then they seem and people are not capable of breathing through plastic bags in small spaces.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: **I own nothing. Cheers.

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**Step One: The Inciting Incident**

Derek Venturi did not like IMing people. He didn't like Myspace or Facebook or anything of that sort, but when bored out of his mind he IMed people persistently in attempt to piss them off. Or, well, he IMed Casey persistently. He always used odd screen names that he had made when he was younger. It was a hobby and a weakness, and it also happened to be what jump-started Derek Venturi into his first great life story. The first meaningful thing that ever happened in his life.

DRockKing12: Hey Basket Case.

Everlife220: …hey?

DRockKing12: What's up?

Everlife220: Um, who is this?

DRockKing12: Who is what?

Everlife220: Okay, I'm signing off now…

DRockKing12: Casey, are you retarded? DRock…I called you Basket Case.

Everlife220: Ooh...D-Rock...i thought it was Dr. Ock...like from Spiderman.

DRockKing12: You know...that kind of makes sense.

Everlife220: Wait, you know my SN?

DRockKing12: No, I just managed to IM some random chick whose screen name I just made up and, oh shit Casey, it's you! Yes, I fucking know your screen name.

Everlife220: a. You're an asshole. b. You make me want to kill small animals, and I'm an activist for god's sake! c. GO FUCK YOURSELF (unless of course you already did that today) and…d. why are you talking to me?

DRockKing12: What do you mean why am I talking to you?

Everlife220: Well, we don't talk, Der, we fight.

DRockKing12: Okay…SHIT GODDAMN CASEY I FUCKING HATE YOUR ANNOYING ASS! Happy?

Everlife220: Real nice. I think you're the first person I've ever met who can actually exhibit sarcasm over the internet.

DRockKing12: I know, I'm quite insidious, aren't I?

Everlife220: Derek, you know what insidious means?

DRockKing12: Don't _you_?

Everlife220: Well yeah…but…_**you**_ know what insidious means?

DRockKing12: Gradually harmful or destructive.

Everlife220: Did you just look that up on the computer, Derek?

DRockKing12: No.

Everlife220: Yes you did.

DRockKing12: No I didn't.

Everlife220: Yes you did!

DRockKing12: No I didn't!

Everlife220: YES YOU DID!!

DRockKing12: NO I DIDN'T!!

"Yes you did!"

Casey pointed an accusing finger at Derek's computer monitor, he whipped around and looked at her in shock.

"Casey! What the fuck are you doing in here?"

She walked over to his computer and motioned harshly. The look on her face was one of anger, malice, and oddly enough betrayal. Derek actually found it kind of funny. Of course he looked up insidious on the computer. Who the fuck wouldn't?

"What the fuck are you lying to me for? I'm right across the hall!"

Derek quickly glanced at his door, wide open.

"Hey, my door was closed!"

Casey rolled her large blue eyes and crossed her arms over her chest.

"Stop being such a woman!"

Derek shrugged.

"All right, I'll stop being such a woman when you shave your mustache and stop being such a man!"

Before he could process what he was saying, Derek laughed aloud, realizing what he had just said. He couldn't help but pat himself on the back, but his "victory" was short lived. Casey pulled out her greatest weapon. "The Derek Yell".

"DER-EK!"

"Oh for god's sake…here we go…" said Derek with a groan.

"GEORGE!"

Derek rolled his eyes and sat back in his chair. He put his hands behind his head and propped his feet up on his desk. George stumbled into the room and with one look at Casey his face fell. George hated dealing with Derek and Casey. He consistently relied on Nora for that part of life, but she had just left to pick up a few things she forgot at work. George braced himself for the roar he knew would soon come from his step-daughter.

"GEORGE! DEREK'S BEING AN ASSHOLE!"

George shook his head.

"Wha—what? Casey, I'm sure you've already gotten used to Derek by now…I mean the two of you have been living together under the same roof for almost three years and—" he reasoned, but Casey chose not to listen.

Figures.

"George, why can't you just understand! God! Where's my mom?!?" she demanded.

George shrugged.

"I don't kno—"

"Oh my God! You don't know anything!"

He tried to ignore Derek's laughing as he followed Casey out the door and across the hall.

"Casey—" he tried to say, but he was simply met with the slamming of her door.

"You know, Dad," said Derek slyly as he walked over to his father with a grin across his face, "this is why I can't get along with her. I'm just trying to start a friendly conversation and what does Casey do? She freaks, which I can't say I wasn't expecting because—"

George shook his head and sighed.

"Derek, room. _Now_."

Derek shrugged.

"Whatever. Tell Nora I'm down for anything but her disgusting tofu tonight."

"We already had dinner."

"Yeah, I remember. Tofu. Hence me saying I'm down for anything but tofu tonight. Don't worry about it, Dad, I'm just being an asshole."

George was used to it too. Sometimes he tried to protest against his seventeen-year-old son's behavior, but it was a fight that could not be won on his behalf.

"Derek, try being an okay guy for just a little while, it's quite refreshing."

"But Dad, I've got charm. You do too. Why do you think you win all your cases. Judge Marion's got the hots for you," said Derek smartly. George shook his head and sighed.

"Son, Judge Marion is a man."

"No Dad, you're the man," he said as he began walking back across the hall to his room.

"And according to Casey, you're the woman."

"Aw, thanks pops, you too."

"Derek—"

And with that Derek shut the door to his room leaving George outside in thought, trying to understand his presumptuous son and uptight step-daughter.

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**So there you have it. Hoped everyone liked chapter one...um, I know people don't IM each other like that (with perfect grammar and shit) but grammar errors really annoy me and besides, I wrote that part on windows and it wouldn't let me screw around with the IM part at all. Soo...uh, thanks for reading.**

**Cheers.**


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing. Cheers.

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**Step Two: Talking About Things With People Who Know About Things**

"She needs to get laid," said Derek absentmindedly.

Sam glanced up from the concrete and took in the sight of his friend. Derek was sprawled out across the top of table they were eating their breakfast burritos at. They had an early hockey practice that morning and the two of them were groggy-eyed, finishing up their food.

"Derek, that coming from your mouth has got to be one of the weirdest things I've ever heard. You still asleep man?"

Derek laughed to himself, taking in the thought. It was true. He spent all his life taunting Casey, trying to push her buttons until there were no more buttons to push, but he had gotten tired of it. He just wanted her to chill out—stop worrying. He wanted to get her to figure out that life was not an ongoing after school special and by doing so; he wanted her to just get laid.

"Yeah, well, Sam the last time the girl got any was when you were dating her and she was at least tolerable. Max was a pussy still in love with his former girlfriend and Nora keeps on bothering her whenever she's around Noel…I actually feel kind of bad for her. If I had to go more than six or seven months without screwing around I would probably die…"

Sam shrugged and got up to throw out the food on his tray.

"Derek, if you had to go more than _six or seven minutes_ without screwing around you would probably die."

Derek sat up straight and laughed.

"And the sad thing is you're probably right," he said proudly as he watched Sam make his way back to the table, empty tray in hand. Sam nodded and raised his eyebrows. Both of them knew it was true. They had been friends for so long that knew each other inside and out. The one thing that frustrated them the most though was neither could figure out the mystery that was Casey McDonald.

"Yep, my friend, I know what's going down. Hence this really fucked up friendship…but I gotta ask, how did you know me and Case had that type of relationship?"

Derek shrugged, as if his answer was apparent and as Sam listened to what his friend said he smiled to himself, reminiscing about his past relationship with Casey and how dense he was for thinking Derek had no clue about it.

"Sam, it was written all over your face. Besides, she's tells Liz everything Liz tells Ed everything and Ed tells me everything—unlike a certain friend of mine."

Sam shook his head and laid it across the table. He reached his hands up to readjust the beanie a-top his head. It was one Casey had bought him for his birthday a year and a half ago. Derek always told him it made him look like a retard, but he still liked it. He claimed it kept his head warm, but since there weren't any tags on it he knew Casey had really knitted it herself. It wasn't perfect, there loose stitches on the inside and she ran out of dark blue so the bottom was done with an indigo sort of color, but the hat had character and it made him happy to know someone cared enough to sit around and knit for hours on end just for him.

He had surpassed his feelings for Casey and moved on. Like Derek, Sam also liked Noel and was very happy that Casey had found someone cool to be with, but he was still a little ticked that he had to be the relationship guinea pig in the Venturi-McDonald household. He had to literally fight for his relationship while the newbies just had so sit back and ask her out.

"Well, I thought you'd freak out and hit me or something, I mean do you not remember your whole 'guy code' tantrum?"

Derek laughed, almost brushing the subject off, but when he saw the look on Sam's face he stopped for a moment and thought it over. He never really gave the subject much thought. He just figured it was his first odd way of exhibiting brotherly love toward Casey, but the truth was that he didn't see Casey as a sister ever. Just a good friend that he fought with all the time. It was Casey that he was jealous of. He only had one true great friend and as much as he was beginning to like Casey he didn't want to lose his best friend to her.

He also figured that Sam dating Casey would be a good thing. At least he liked Sam. If Sam was some fuck-bag it might have been a different story. That fight might actually have sprung from real protectiveness toward Casey, but it didn't. Derek laughed to himself a little bit—the notion that he was jealous of Casey for "stealing his best friend" made him feel a little gay. A phenomenon that rarely happened within the virile nature of Derek Venturi's life.

"Sam, that was just me being a dick. But I got over it. Look Sam, you're my best friend and Casey's my step-sister and I finally saw that if she's going to be dating someone it might as well be someone I like because if she ended up bringing home some complete ass-hat, much like Max was, then I would have to hang around that person all the fucking time which would suck. Thank God Noel actually has some sort of personality because, Christ, if she went two for two when it came to total and complete douche bags than…well, let's just say the world would be rid of some of it's scum."

Sam looked up and grinned.

"But it would still have you."

Derek jumped off the table and brought his tray over to the trashcan. He dumped his trash and walked back over to Sam, lightheartedly smacking the tray over his head.

"Shut up, man."

"Hey I'm not the one who wants his step-sister to get laid," Sam pointed out, giving his friend a light shove.

"All right, putting it that way makes it seem really fucked up."

"D, it _is_ fucked up."

Derek shrugged.

"Not if you think of it like this—she gets laid, I get more sleep at night."

Sam laughed.

"All right, that's possibly more fucked up because if you say it that way it insinuates that you fucked her and—"

"All right, all right, all right; Casey get's laid by some dude, she stops throwing tantrums and blaming her shit life on me, I don't have to deal with her annoying ass, I get more sleep at night."

Derek grinned triumphantly.

"There you go, D, thanks for putting life into perspective for me."

"You are quite welcome."

Sam glanced at the clock on his phone and rolled his eyes. He got up and took his keys from his pocket.

"Jesus, we're almost late for practice. Let's head out, man."

Derek nodded and they began walking to Sam's car. As Derek pulled himself into the passenger's seat and pained expression came across his face.

"Hey Sam,"

"Yeah, D, what's up?" said Sam absentmindedly as he put his keys into the ignition and started the car.

"If I said the word 'insidious' would you think I knew what it meant?"

Sam raised his eyebrows and looked at his friend very seriously.

"Derek, if you said the word 'insidious' correctly in a sentence I would most likely be under the impression that aliens had abducted and probed you."

Derek shook his head and reached out to turn on the radio. Nirvana's "Lithium" blared from the speakers.

"Thanks for the reassurance," said Derek with a nod. Sam laughed as he pulled away from the Smoker's Express.

"_Do_ you know what insidious means?" he asked with a smile.

"Fuck you."

"No really, _do you_?"

"Sam drive the fucking car, we're gonna be late for practice."

Sam shook his head and turned up the volume.

"Whatever you say, D, whatever you say."

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**Hope you guys liked it. Please review. Things'll get juicy in the next chapter. **

**Cheers.**


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing. Cheers.

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**Step Three: We Talk About Things Other People Don't Understand**

Casey's room had blank, pale walls. She looked around, examining them, contemplating the reasons why she never did anything to them. Then the answer came upon her. She always figured Nora and George would end quickly. Why should they stay together and be happy for such a long time? It couldn't happen like that…Casey still had a real dad. She didn't need a George too.

But as Casey looked around at her walls she sighed to herself and began searching the internet for room décor ideas. She was growing up. Casey had gone from being an uptight freshman to an uptight cheerleading sophomore to a slightly more grown up junior and it was time for a change. No more pinks, no more purples, no more color coded drawers. Just…something else.

"Case?"

Casey looked up from her desk to the door. It was Lizzie. She smiled.

"Hey, Liz, what's up?"

"Ed."

Casey frowned. She had known for a while about Lizzie's small crush on Edwin. She hoped it would go away. Liz and Ed had always had a good relationship with one another, unlike the relationship Casey shared with Derek. Casey always figured one would start to like the other. She just hoped they would form too close of a platonic bond before anything of that sort happened. But then again, even she and Derek never formed a platonic bond. She knew that could never happen the night they got stuck in the bathroom together. That night Casey felt something toward Derek that she couldn't quite explain.

When she met Sam she was hit, head-on, with the same feeling.

She never felt that sort of thing for Derek again after that, but just knowing it was there, knowing that at any moment it could come back…

Casey shook her head and motioned for Lizzie to sit on the bed.

"Lizzie, what happened?"

"It sucked…God, why me, Case? Why am I the one that this has to happen to? I mean why couldn't Edwin be the one…I mean, it's incest right? Or well, no it's not because we're not actually related…but…God, I feel like I'm in Cruel Intentions or something. All I need is a bitchy attitude and a crack cross…"

Casey rolled her eyes. She didn't like it when Liz talked like that, but Lizzie was a freshman in high school, what could Casey do?

She got up from her desk seat and sat down next to Liz.

"But, what exactly happened?" she asked in thought.

Lizzie had had few boyfriends and crushes in general. Sure, a lot of guys liked her. She was a cute, spunky tomboy who played Babe Raiders and rocked it out at skateboarding and soccer. She was ideal, but she was also picky. Casey was surprised to find out it was Liz who liked Edwin and not the other way around.

"Well," Liz said quietly, "he…god, sometimes he can be just like Derek, it makes me so angry!"

Casey knew what she was talking about. They all went to the same school. Even though Derek and Ed were polar opposites, they both had the same charm. It ran in the family. While Derek schooled the world in the likes of sports and music Ed schooled the world in the likes of art and romance. As stupid as it happened to sound, Ed had grown up and out of his bodily function phase and into something that was almost better than his older brother. He was tapping out the frosh population one by one.

Every girl, except Lizzie.

"Uhg…I hate school. I HATE school…I wish I could just…just…I don't know, be apart of a different family or something."

Casey smiled to herself at her sister's words. She felt like that every day of her life when she was younger. And there was always one person she knew she could count on. Casey put her arm around Liz reassuringly and grinned.

"Lizzie, now that you are a high school student I think it's time I pass my legacy on to you."

"Case, you have a legacy?"

"Well…not really…but I do have a friend that can help you with whatever you need."

"You're not gonna like…give me pot or something, are you?"

"Liz, I'm Casey not Derek, please, Casey and pot have never been in the same sentence before."

"Yeah, momentary lapse of judgment, sorry."

"Liz, next time you're feeling a little annoyed at life take a cool turn down corridor B and make a left into room 46. His name's Paul. He's a life-saver."

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"Hey Derek."

Derek ducked his head out of the fridge and looked at his brother.

"Hey man, what's up?"

Edwin shrugged and jumped up onto the counter. Feet laced up into high tops dangled half a foot above the ground.

"Shit's gone down, bro."

Derek raised his eyebrows, face adorned with a mile Cheshire grin.

"What kind of shit?" he asked, as he took a carton of orange juice from the fridge and drank from it.

Ed reached up and brushed his hair off his face. It had grown out a lot. He had curls, just like his and Derek's mom.

"Well," he said quietly, "a certain couple broke up in the caf today. It was brutal."

Derek frowned.

"Uh, what certain couple?"

The sound of the front door to the Venturi/McDonald house slamming shut echoed throughout the house into the kitchen. Derek and Edwin looked at each other with wide eyes. Edwin jumped off the counter and pulled up the sleeves of his plaid flannel shirt. They both watched, Ed backing away toward the kitchen door, as Casey stormed inside and promptly walked to the refrigerator door. Derek stared.

"Get out of my fucking way," said Casey menacingly, looking her step-brother right into his brown, playful eyes. She didn't even care about the hint of a grin still present on Derek's face ase he tried to keep from laughing. At least, that's what she thought she saw. Sometimes she felt she was mistaking h derek's kindness for cruelness, but other times She was positive that there wasn't a kind bone in his body. .

Derek backed away from the fridge in surprise as he watched Casey grab a Monster and down the entire thing in one gulp. She grabbed another one before stalking out of the kitchen and stomping her way up the stairs.

"Oh shit…" whispered Derek to himself. He remembered when Casey had broke things off with Max. She was like hell. He actually had to sleep in her room one night to keep her from freaking out all over the place. He slept on the floor, but something had come over him that night. She fell asleep in his arms and something about that freaked Derek out. Girls did not freak Derek Venturi out, but the way Casey looked in his arms did. It took him three days to shake the feeling off, but every once in a while he got it, and it still made him feel uneasy.

"Yeah, well, guess you got shit to clean up," said Edwin with a grin before walking out of the kitchen.

Derek sighed to himself.

Yeah, he had shit to clean up, and it was scaring him half to death.

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**Thanks for reading. Hope you liked it. Please review.**


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing. Cheers.

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Step Four: Realizing the Significance of Umbrella Racks

Derek remembered his mother better than Edwin and Marti combined. Sometimes he was afraid that he remembered her better than George too, but then he would see his father stop and stare at things like the umbrella rack or the door to the living room closet or the stain in the wood next to the couch and Derek wouldn't be afraid of that anymore because he knew exactly why George was staring.

Derek knew every instant of the life he had with his mother and father and he knew that everything in the house from the way the tacks on their corkboard were always arranged to the way that there were always more magnets under the fridge than on it had something to do with the fact that even though George had moved on—even though he was in love with Nora and he had two step kids, he still cared.

She was still present in Derek's house through the ghostly inklings of love that still perpetuated through George's heart and transcended into the daily routine he had become accustomed to performing.

Derek remembered how he would wake up to the sound of a crying baby and a screaming toddler. He remembered the soft sound of her cooing to Marti. He remembered how she would dance with Edwin to make him feel better. How his mother would never fail to sing to Derek when he couldn't sleep.

He remembered how happy George was all the time. Even after George had lost a case she knew how to make him feel better with just one word.

They were a loud and happy family and he had been happy.

He used to hear her laughter all the time.

Derek could not hear his mother's voice as he ascended the stairs to Casey's bedroom. He couldn't hear anything. No crying babies, no screaming toddlers, no music and laughter, no smoke alarms because she burned the pancakes…it was just silent and although Derek had gotten used to it he was never more aware of its presence in his life.

He stopped at Casey's door and looked around, face and eyes set with a dangerous emptiness and apathy. Just before he opened the door he thought to himself, _there aren't as many pictures as there used to be_, but he shook the thought out of his head. He had other things to worry about.

He had a girl he needed to worry about. And she wasn't dead.

"Well, hey there, Basket Case."

She was sitting on her bead looking through swatches of different colored paints. Her head shot up at the sound of Derek's voice and she narrowed her eyes. Maybe she didn't need him this time. Maybe it was the other way around.

"Derek, get out of my room."

Derek looked around. The walls used to be green. A light pale green. It was Marti's nursery when she was little. Edwin's too. Casey didn't even know how much history her room had. It was just a four-walled hideaway for her…not anything to be sad or happy about. Just four white walls with a bed, desk, and dresser.

Derek shrugged and sat down on the bed beside her.

"Wasn't always your room," he stated without much thought.

Casey rolled her eyes. She was tired of hearing the same old thing from Derek. She couldn't use the game closet, she couldn't sit in his stupid chair, she couldn't use his pancake mix—and why? Because it wasn't always hers. As if she wasn't already angry enough, she had to hear the same old stupid story again.

"Well, Derek, if you haven't noticed it's my fucking room now so shove off. I'm trying to figure things out."

"Things about Noel?" he asked quietly.

Casey looked up quickly from the paint swatches. She knew for a fact that Derek had skipped school to hang out with some college friends who'd graduated. She figured he wouldn't find out about the fight she had with Noel. She frowned.

_Guess news travels fast_…she thought.

"Derek, why don't you mind your own business?"

She watched him carefully as he stood up, shrugged, and began walking back to her door. It was weird. Usually he would stay and keep on talking to her. Usually he would try to get the story out of her and then he'd become a brother and tell her everything would be okay. He wasn't doing that though. He was leaving her behind.

She didn't like it when people left her behind.

"Derek, just—God….wait a second, okay?"

He turned and watched her as she debated within herself whether or not to open up. She looked at him. His hair was short but still in disarray, he stood in a slightly cocky way on he could, but his eyes didn't have their usual glint. Casey didn't know what to think about that, but she knew she didn't like it.

So without even thinking about what she was doing, she did the only thing she knew she could to get the glint back in his eyes, because for some reason unbeknownst to her that glint was an important part of Casey's day. Without it everything was shitty. Almost unbearable.

Casey had one consistent thing in her life and that was Derek. She couldn't let Derek become just like every other normal human being she knew because that would wrong. Everything would fall apart. So in order to keep things like the space-time continuum of her life from collapsing Casey laughed at Derek and she grinned and said to him that he looked like Emily after the eighteenth time he had turned her down since he was being so pouty.

"What?" he asked, grin spreading itself across his face.

And Casey was relieved.

Derek walked over to her bed and sat down on it again, only slightly registering the closeness he had with Casey. He had come upstairs thinking he would have to fix her because he had seen her broken so many times, but he was beginning to realize that Casey was the type of girl that learned from her mistakes. She was stronger than he had anticipated. Already able to make stupid jokes and laugh only a few hours after she broke up with her three-month boyfriend? That wasn't the Casey that first moved into the Venturi house almost three years ago.

Derek looked down at his hands as Casey started talking about what happened in the caf, and she was laughing the whole time. She started talking about her fight with Noel as if it was the stupidest and funniest thing she had ever taken part of.

And as Derek listened to her laugh he was surprised at what he heard.

It was something much better than silence.

It was music and dancing and the sound of a happy home. Derek watched her as she stood and began reenacting the situation in the caf, even dawning a bad imitation of Noel's voice whenever she was talking for him, and Derek couldn't stop thinking about how happy George was with his mother.

And that feeling, the feeling he was so scared of, came back, but Derek didn't care. He didn't try to ignore it. He wasn't even afraid of it. Instead of all that, he got off the bed and hugged her. He hugged her because for some reason he knew she needed it. At first, because she was so confused, she didn't hug him back it only took her half a second to wrap her arms around his neck and bury her face into his chest.

"How'd you know I was just trying to make myself feel better?" she whispered, warm tears bleeding through Derek's shirt.

Derek shrugged. He didn't even know the answer to that. All he knew was that he was aware of why he was in that room hugging Casey McDonald, trying to make sure everything was okay.

All he knew was that the sound of her voice—her laughter—made him think of the umbrella rack and the closet in the living room and the stain on the wood next to the couch.

All he knew was that Casey McDonald made him happy.

And he wasn't scared.

He wasn't scared at all.

Actually, he was the opposite. Derek was enlightened. He finally knew why it was so hard for him to just treat her as a sister. It wasn't because he loved her or he liked her or anything like that, but because there was something there between them. There was a bond there that could never be normal.

There was an unspoken attraction and chemistry. A "vibe".

And that did not scare him in the least.

Unfortunately, it was pretty much the equivalent of Freddy Krueger to Casey.

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**Thanks so much to my three lovely reviewers, what you said was GREATLY appreciated on my behalf. I hope everybody liked this chapter. Please review.**

**Cheers.**


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